Snail Pace Progress

From my last post, I said that I wanted to do something about this loop that I'm constantly in. I have made almost no progress since that last post. It's frustrating but I'm the only one to blame for this. I have at least started with my list though. Lol. It's not much, but it's something to start off with at least.

I've been reading and researching about this topic of "living and working passionately". It seems the common theme is finding out what you believe in and doing something in relation to the cause that you believe in. Without your 'why', you can't possibly have a fulfilling life. Most of us are just doing what we're asked to do, or what we believe is the 'right thing to do'. Be it doing a job that provides security even though it sucks the soul out of you, buying a house because everyone else is doing it, investing because it's the 'in' thing, or getting married because it's 'time'. It has always been a mind boggling question.

I have yet to find my own purpose and I know I'm not alone. So many people whom I speak to are in this constant battle with themselves. Some will win and eventually find their why. Some will give in to society and tell themselves they are happier that way without the battle. I haven't given up yet, but it's such a tough battle.

You would think that you know yourself the best. Yet when I try to explore my own thoughts, desire, want, passion, my mind goes blank. Has the social norm and society successfully swallowed my mind? So many times I tell myself to stop thinking because there is no point in all this extra thinking. Not as if my life is miserable. In fact, it's very good. Except from the fact that I constantly feel that something is missing. Sighs, the constant battle with myself.

Ok, this post is going no where. I still need more time to sort out myself. I need to change my approach in handling this problem though. Perhaps I should start writing here more often again. To at least get some ideas out of my head anyway...